Widow and widower dating services
It was hard to know what “the norm” was, or what was considered appropriate by society. I finally realized that I had only myself to judge what felt right, so really the question was: “Am I ready? I knew I was interested in experiencing intimacy again with another person. Most single people in their thirties and forties tend to be divorced or have never been married.
” This was also a very difficult question to answer. Do you feel that, as a widow, your dating issues are different than others within your age range? Well, I was unlike most divorced people in that I had no animosity towards my husband. I knew what that felt like, how it worked and that I wasn’t willing to settle for anything less than a good relationship, which I was only able to describe as the feeling of “being home.” There had to be some sort of recognition within the other person, similar values and shared outlook on life.
For another couple who met on Stitch (she a divorcee named “Lynn” and he a widower named “Paul”) the question of whether they would be compatible because of their different losses never came up. Maybe we cry for different reasons, but having a shoulder to cry on, someone I love, it doesn’t matter about how we got there, just that we found each other now.”Paul said, “Of course I miss my wife and yes she was my soul mate. She and I have built a new life together and every day I’m grateful to Stitch for leading me to her. Such a mix of different trauma and pain led her to feel that the only way to feel right again was to find another husband.
Lynn said, “There will be obstacles to overcome in any relationship and ours is no different. But, I am able to think of that as my past, as Chapter 1 in my book of life. She went on hundreds of dates, never able to commit to someone and never feeling better. She said, “It wasn’t until Stitch that I realized that what was missing from my life wasn’t a man. Having these women in my life has magically brought me back to my youth.
I have re-discovered what I loved most about being a girl and hanging out with my friends …
only without the angst and self-esteem issues that haunted me then. I’ve reconnected with JOY and discovered Peace of Mind. ” Her advice is to forget about dating and focus on finding true friends.
I had little confidence that anyone would ever be willing to step into my mess of a life.” When her husband died on 9/11, Abigail Carter, author of ( was still in her thirties and the mother of two young children.
Thrown unexpectedly into the single life again, many widows and widowers have a hard time imagining they are still “dating material” or that they could ever be sitting across the restaurant table getting to know someone new.And yet, the desire to connect with someone persists.“The most challenging thing that came to mind when I considered dating again,” says Penny Webb, a widowed Seattle writer and stay-at-home mom, “was wondering who in the world would want a train wreck/mother of two/grieving widow like me!What’s the combination that will give you the best chance for true companionship?At Stitch, many of our members are either widowed or divorced, which brings new challenges to finding a partner later in life.
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